Jokes for a happy pregnancy! :D

Halia · 03-20-2013

They're bloody funny but true! And thanks for agreeing with me. Haha!

Dalinda · 03-24-2013

Haha, funny realities!
And the last one is so true! Grrr...

Cadelaria · 03-24-2013

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dalinda

Haha, funny realities!
And the last one is so true! Grrr...

LOL Dalinda! Sorry for giving you breastfeeding as an advice in losing weight on another thread! Now my credibility has been put in question!

Adalira · 03-31-2013

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cadelaria

LOL Dalinda! Sorry for giving you breastfeeding as an advice in losing weight on another thread! Now my credibility has been put in question!

Of course not hun! LOL!

Edda · 04-02-2013

Am I more likely to get pregnant if my husband wears boxers rather then briefs?
~Yes, but you’ll have an even better chance if he doesn’t wear anything at all.

Are birth control pills deductible?
~Only if they don’t work.

What is a chastity belt?
~A labor-saving device.

Should I have a baby after 35?
~No, 35 children are enough.

Can a mother get pregnant while nursing?
~Yes, but it’s much easier if she removes the baby from her breast and puts him to sleep first.

My husband and I are very attractive. I’m sure our baby will be beautiful enough for commercials. Whom should I contact about this?
~Your therapist.

I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
~With any luck, right after he finishes high school.

How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?
~If it’s the flu, you’ll get better.

Since I became pregnant, my breasts, rear-end, and even my feet have grown. Is there anything that gets smaller during pregnancy?
~Yes, your bladder.

What is the most common pregnancy craving?
~For men to be the ones who get pregnant.

source

Fanny · 04-04-2013

Oh my God Edda, I can't stop laughing with those jokes! LOL

Cailyn · 04-05-2013

Quote:

Originally Posted by Edda

Am I more likely to get pregnant if my husband wears boxers rather then briefs?
~Yes, but you’ll have an even better chance if he doesn’t wear anything at all.

Are birth control pills deductible?
~Only if they don’t work.

What is a chastity belt?
~A labor-saving device.

Should I have a baby after 35?
~No, 35 children are enough.

Can a mother get pregnant while nursing?
~Yes, but it’s much easier if she removes the baby from her breast and puts him to sleep first.

My husband and I are very attractive. I’m sure our baby will be beautiful enough for commercials. Whom should I contact about this?
~Your therapist.

I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
~With any luck, right after he finishes high school.

How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?
~If it’s the flu, you’ll get better.

Since I became pregnant, my breasts, rear-end, and even my feet have grown. Is there anything that gets smaller during pregnancy?
~Yes, your bladder.

What is the most common pregnancy craving?
~For men to be the ones who get pregnant.

source

HAHAHAHAH! Very funny!

Fabiola · 04-06-2013

Quote:

Originally Posted by Edda

Am I more likely to get pregnant if my husband wears boxers rather then briefs?
~Yes, but you’ll have an even better chance if he doesn’t wear anything at all.

Are birth control pills deductible?
~Only if they don’t work.

What is a chastity belt?
~A labor-saving device.

Should I have a baby after 35?
~No, 35 children are enough.

Can a mother get pregnant while nursing?
~Yes, but it’s much easier if she removes the baby from her breast and puts him to sleep first.

My husband and I are very attractive. I’m sure our baby will be beautiful enough for commercials. Whom should I contact about this?
~Your therapist.

I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
~With any luck, right after he finishes high school.

How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?
~If it’s the flu, you’ll get better.

Since I became pregnant, my breasts, rear-end, and even my feet have grown. Is there anything that gets smaller during pregnancy?
~Yes, your bladder.

What is the most common pregnancy craving?
~For men to be the ones who get pregnant.

source

@Edda! This is sooo mad! LOOOOOOOL! I absolutely love these!

What is a chastity belt?
~A labor-saving device.

Should I have a baby after 35?
~No, 35 children are enough.
Lol Lol lol!!!!

Fabiola · 04-06-2013

Quote:

Originally Posted by Halia

source

LOL! I had a lot of time spent... SWEATING! lol

Gaetana · 04-07-2013

Quote:

Originally Posted by Edda

Am I more likely to get pregnant if my husband wears boxers rather then briefs?
~Yes, but you’ll have an even better chance if he doesn’t wear anything at all.

My husband and I are very attractive. I’m sure our baby will be beautiful enough for commercials. Whom should I contact about this?
~Your therapist.

Since I became pregnant, my breasts, rear-end, and even my feet have grown. Is there anything that gets smaller during pregnancy?
~Yes, your bladder.

These are my favourites!

Oh, but before I forget Edda, just wanna say that you're crazy for sharing this! LOL.